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This is a tale that normally would thrill me and my fellow kittens. After all, what could be more delicious than dead mice? It’s the sort of story that every feline loves to hear about. Yes, it begins with the demise of three blind mice. But as I am now the official chronicler of the…
I’d like to dedicate this fascinating conclusion to one of Mr. Tibbs’ great furriends (and a spunky ginger nurse) who was becoming one of my favourites . . , Fairy. 🧚. She’s with many of her furriends OTRB 🌈 now and we will all miss her. Dash *the sorrowful one* The Assistant Niplegger: Part II…
I went to see the Kontinental Kat about something which was bothering me. “What can I do for you, young Dash?” The black cat asked as I sat across from him at his desk. “I wonder if you would consider doing me a little favour?” I implored. The Kontinental Kat opened up a box on…
Dash here . . . I was informed that my GrandPops, Sundance has gone OTRB 🌈 this week. And I found this tribute amongst Mr. Tibbs’ papers. He knew that The Dude had a serious health issue and did not have long to exist. So, in honour of both these wonderful black cats, I thought…
The lovely Savoy came for a visit and despite her beauty, I was preoccupied with recent events. Would Patches really think that I had ratted on her? Would she think I was a snake in the grass? Or would the Emperor Roast-Rump accuse me of having him arrested? I am no snitch! I began to…
After the harrowing experience of ‘The Kissing Bandit’ affair, I realized I was not my brofur’s keeper and that he was going to make his own decisions. As I did. So, I thought it best to remain as far away from Zen and my sisfur, Patches, as possible. I don’t know about you, but I’ve…
“I’m being framed!” I told the Kontinental Kat, as I sat in his office. The chubby, black cat sharpened his claws on the leg of my chair. “Framed for what?” He asked. “Someone is kissing all the felines and I’m getting the blame.” I explained my dilemma. “Ah . . . I see . .…
As you all know, my brofur and I have recently been ensconced into our new home. It’s true that we, being rambunctious kittens, like to wrestle and tussle whenever we can . . . Now, this behaviour is not adversarial at all. We both have our good and bad qualities. The truth is . .…
First off, let me assure you, no one in this story was harmed in any way. It is a work of fiction and while some of the names I have used, of the not so ‘innocent’, are known to everyone. Take heart, they are all fine. This story is my first to include the Kontinental…
I may have mentioned, last week, about an abnormal fascination I have with ‘socks’. Although, in the past, (Editor’s Note: Yes, last week is considered ‘the past’? 😼 - 😇🐈⬛ 🌈) I have used these items as a natural propofol (or anesthetic) and they have induced a deep sleep when inhaled, after the human has…
Some of you may be aware of my new sisfur, Patches or the Widow Patches as she insists on being called. (Editor’s Note: She-😈 is new to Dash. NOT the rest of us! 😇🐈⬛ 🌈). So far, I’ve found her personality to be scintillating. No doubt she is admired by all. Yet, Zen and I…
This is my first blog (one of many, I hope), since I moved into my new home. And as such, it behooves me to introduce, not only myself, Dash, but my brofur, Zen, also. HuMom calls us ‘The Purr Brofurs’ (not really sure why?), she says it has something to do with our vociferous acknowledgement…
With quill in paw, I sat outside the D. O. G.’s H. Q. cave while Basil and Clinton went in to infiltrate. As I sat composing a poem, I was stuck for a rhyme for ‘Taco’. Try as I might nothing came to me. Before I could get very far with my piece of writing…
Stepping out of the Royal carriage was none other than Lord Graydon! “LG . . . Bud . . . So good to see you! How have you been? I see you’ve taken your proper place up here OTRB.” I meowed to my good pal. “Geez . . . You’re looking exceptionally well. If Patches…
Bringing up the rear was my usual position. Being OTRB 🌈 did not make lagging behind any different, despite the fact that I was now pain free. I continued to be a bit on the slow side. I have to admit there were a couple of drawbacks about the rainbow bridge . . . The…
“Clinton?!” I yowled. As happy as I was to see my old, Aussie, Selkirk Rex pal, Basil held me back. “Remember . . . He could be a traitor.” Basil murmured cautiously. I took a step back. Surely not. Not Clinty Boy. “Bud . . . What are you doing with all these rabbits?” I…
Basil and I must have walked for miles! After we set off to find the Evil Tariff Boy, it was a full five minutes before I was totally exhausted and particularly famished. Obviously, I was burning off calories at a tremendous rate. I had to sit down. “What are you doing?” Basil asked. His concern…
“Basil!” I threw my paws around my pal’s neck. Then we had a roll around on the floor. “Tibbs . . . Cut it out!” Basil stood up, his tail all puffed up. “I’m so happy to see you, Bas. It’s been too long, Bud!” I began. “Come here and let me give your ears…
After being kissed on the head for what felt like an eternity I fell asleep. 🌈 When I awoke, I found myself in a surreal realm. I stood up and for the first time, in a very long while, I felt absolutely no pain! All four legs not only worked as they were meant to,…
Sunday will be 3 weeks since I went OTRB 🌈 . (I’ll write more about that next week). But with the world in turmoil, the Pope passing away on Easter weekend and many of our cat furriends giving up the Ghost, prophecy dictates that a Saviour will return to earth in order to save catmanity.…
First of all, I’d like dedicate this blog to my good furriend, Donald. I owe him so much, as his entertaining movies helped me find my voice both on Twitter and with my writing. (Without him there would have been no #MTIFF!) He was always kind and showed me just how much love us cats…
If you don’t know it by now, I am on a quest for health this year. Yes, this massive bundle of love is about to become a lean, mean flirting machine! (Except for the ‘meanness’, of course. I’m never mean especially when flirting). For far too long I’ve been ridiculed, harassed and made fun of…
Chapter 12 The BSH kittens played in the sitting room while Nurse Fairy kittensat them. She, also, kept a trained eye on the Widow Patches, who hovered in a corner watching the youngster frolicking about. When I entered the room, I was subjected to a mad dash around me, amidst meows of ‘Uncle Tibbs .…
Chapter 11 Nurses Fairy and Cheeky helped the Equerry into the Nipperage. They sat him on the couch to apply a soothing salve to the kilt area. Apparently, the young man had been stung by a roving wasp. The Widow Patches kept a close scrutiny on the two youngsters while Freda and myself escorted the…
Chapter 10 Nurses Fairy and Cheeky managed to haul me to my paws, amidst a good deal of grunting and groaning. Luckily, both felines were prepared to cater to my every whim, yet they ignored my feeble protestations and simply wiped away the sweat of my brow with a few well-placed licks. The two nurses…
Chapter 9 Cheeky and Fairy sat in the kitchen gobbling up their breakfast before another full day of higher education. Today’s topic was to be of a horticultural nature. ‘How Best To Grow Catnip’ with the sub-topic of Soil Samples. I joined them before their day began in earnest. Fairy took the opportunity of confessing,…
Chapter 8 When the She-😈 and I returned to the Nipperage and saw the destruction in the living room, the Widow Patches had to be restrained. Unfortunately, I had no idea where the nip supply was (or if, indeed, there was any left). It took a Herculean effort to keep her calm. So, I soothed…
Chapter 6 “Quick . . . get the nip smelling salts.” Cheeky meowed in triage mode. Fairy shot off. “Let’s get her out of these ropes.” Cheeky ordered and I obeyed. We sliced through the thick hemp with some effort but had freed Patches by the time Fairy returned with a pawful of nip inhalants.…
Chapter 7 I entered the theatre surrounded by a bevy of Babes. Not only did I escort Freda to Shelby’s play, but Cheeky, Fairy and Patches joined us. Tonight I would be the envy of everyone attending the show. Oh, yes . . . Tibbs and his Angels were on the town. We took our…
Chapter 5 I waited until the next morning to inform my sisfur that some of the cat mint plants had gone astray. I found her in the library, staring out of the windows. The room overlooked the backyard where the Herbarium was situated. She purred softly leading me to believe her mood was better than…
Chapter 4 Supper time arrived and I sauntered into the kitchen to find Cheeky standing in front of Patches. “Show me what’s in your paws?” Patches demanded of Cheeky. “It’s nothing . . . Honestly!” Cheeky kept her front paws behind her back. It was obvious, even to me, that she was hiding something. “If…
Chapter 3 “WTFloof?!!!” THUD! Patches passed out. “Help me get her up.” I attempted to right her. Cheeky, a conscientious nurse rushed to my aide and together we managed to rouse the Widow Patches. “It’s gone . . . How can it be gone? Who, in their right mind, would do such a thing?” Patches…
Chapter 2 “Tibbs? What are you doing in Thong?” Shelby meowed as we entered the limo. “I’m not wearing a thong.” I mistook her meaning and thought she referred to my attire. “He’s here, in Thong-OTG, to see Patches.” Freda meowed up. “Ah . . . I’d heard she was in town.” Shelby turned her…
Chapter 1 I sat on the train, on my way to see the Widow Patches, my sisfur. She had recently re-joined her religious order in the small village of Thong-On-The-Groyne, located in Southwestern Ontario. Not that I’m biased or anything but Thong OTG sounded like an extremely interesting place to be. I had a premonition…
The invitations have gone out and if I’ve missed anyone, I would formerly like to invite you all to ‘Mr. Tibbs’ New Year’s Thonging Eve Pawty’! The only stipulation I ask is that all the felines line up to give me a kiss to rock in the new year. (After my Babes, of course). A…
Tibbs spent the night delivering gifts. And now his task is doneWith all those toys and no fork-liftsIt’s time to have some funThe work was hard and a toilTibbs found himself quite starvedA little snack will never spoilThe turkey once it’s carvedFor Christmas Day, it has arrivedCheers from the cold North PoleAnother year Tibbs has…
When last we met, Tibbs split his trewsHis Santa suit all tornThe elves worked hard & in twosTheir fingers they were worn. They sewed, they darned, his suit restoredSanta Tibbs he donned costumeThe candy canes which he did hoardOne by one, he would consume No matter what, he’ll make this runExpect great gifts for allTibbs…
Yes, every cat in CatdomThought Christmas was such funBut Tibbster could be quite glum. When treats, they are undoneThe Yuletide holidayA time in which he cheered. Oh Tibbs is no gourmetA heaped up bowl, he clearedPerhaps if he were thinnerHis belly that much slenderOne roasting turkey dinnerWould keep his outlook tenderHe stuffed his gob, he…